Metaphors Flying free knowing there is always a light house to guide me to where I choose to fly.


I can only remember the darkness between the waves. The cracking sounds of the wind smacking two waves against each other, the water slapping my face, the salt on my lips, and my little arms grasping onto the side of the rubber boat, not bigger than the length of my legs. The storm wrenching me further and further from the marina, away from the coast, away from those two giant fantom mountains bordering the village of Cadaques in the Pyrenees ranges. The dark waves swallowing me…
Past the fear to be devoured, taken away, forgotten, ignored, rejected…from wave to wave. After confronting my demons, carried on the crisp of a wave, I notice in the distance the light flickering from the light house, bigger, then smaller, then bigger again… And as I get bursted around into the nowhere I notice the light is always here. And this is all I focus on…before the black hole.
Out of nowhere I hear a sound. Out of nowhere a hand grasps me. “You are safe” … I find myself holding tight onto this stranger perplexed fisherman who is completely stunned having found a little 5 year old girl grasping onto a rubber kid boat, on his road back to port, apparently kilometres from the Spanish Coast.

From Fear to Trust
I was reflecting on the power of metaphors in our life, and this 50 year old memory resurfaced with this realisation: could the flickering light from a far away light house have shifted my state, created the magic and saved my life?
How many times in our life do we feel out of control, in up and down waves carrying us out and away into the ocean of life, having forgotten or not even knowing where the coast is?
What would it take to see the flickering light and know with certainty that you are not lost? Knowing, choosing, designing your own light house, so you can always find your way to your chosen destination. I love this metaphor that, as a coach I am the fisherman who lifts you up, helps you choose your destination and supports you back to the port.
And what if in the process, you could wake up the alchemist in you, who has the power to use the storm as a propellor to take you faster where you didn’t dare to go? What if the flickering light ignited in you a new passion for life and you took the risk to enjoy the journey?
As I write these words, I feel a strong emotion rising in me, as I suddenly realise how this defining terrifying moment might have been a gift in my life…

How are you speaking to yourself? What metaphors are you using to describe the events in your life? What do those metaphors mean to you? Are they empowering or disempowering you?
You are the alchemist who has the power to choose metaphors now and create a new meaning and a new world full of possibilities for you.

I would love for you to share this. As you read my experience and what it means to me now, how can you change the meaning of your stumbles and/or your biggest fears, to make them the stepping stones to your success?

Build a life, don’t live one!


“The ideas I stand for are not mine. I borrowed them from Socrates. I swiped them from Chesterfield. I stole them from Jesus. And I put them in a book. If you don’t like their rules, whose would you use?” – Dale Carnegie.

Wise Ashton Kutcher, after portraying Steve Jobs in a recent movie, started his acceptance speech for his Teen Choice Award with the following words “ Build a life, don’t live one”.

We live a life by creating a reality around us, which doesn’t support us. Much of what we think is true is a misinterpretation we have made from experiences in our life or from experiences of our parents, teachers and culture we live in… and we become those assumptions. Those positive or negative expectations about ourselves, others and circumstances become our unconscious beliefs.

We start looking for things that reinforce our interpretations. And we create our self-fulfilling prophecies based on how we see the world.

We have the choice to challenge those unbalanced beliefs, which do not serve us.

How do you build a life?

Dale Carnegie, who starts his life in 1888 as a poor farmer’s boy, also wrote: “Happiness doesn’t depend on any external conditions: it is governed by our mental attitude”. Until we rewrite or re-interpret those child assumptions we have made (most often when we were just a child), we continue to suffer and struggle, moving further from what we really want in life.

We become addicted to those emotions of anger or fear.

We go through life guided by those negative emotions rather than our true intuition (based on love).
In my belief, happiness is a decision. Examining the untruth and gaining a new perspective, allows us to change the interpretation from our past (and our future) in a way that support us, and to gradually live free from those addictive negative emotions. With this new awareness, we can create a new vision of “Who” we decide to be. We start making choices that guides us to the places and circumstances where we live from this new vision. As our emotions start to change, so are the circumstances and people we will attract and allow in our life. We become more empowered, we grow, and we take more actions … soon we becoming aligned with our new vision.

I borrowed the introduction from Dale Carnegie, so he might as well write the conclusion:
“Are you bored with life? Then throw yourself into some work you believe in with all your heart, live for it, die for it, and you will find happiness that you had thought could never be yours.” – Dale Carnegie.
My passion is to help you do just that!

Healing, Wellness and Living Whole (part one)


Chris, a good friend of mine in his fifties, shared how he recently lost 7kg over a 12 weeks period, and achieved a target weight he enjoyed over 12 years earlier. Indeed, he looks fit, trim and strong. And he feels justifiably proud of himself. When I asked how he did it, his answer was straightforward:

3 things:
No alcohol during the week;
1 hour of gym work each day;
No food that is white/beige – eg) bread/rice/pasta/sugar.

On weekends, he cut loose and did whatever….

This all sounds incredibly simple, with an impressive result nevertheless. But let’s explore this approach a little more closely.

Alcohol contains a deceptively large number of calories. 7 calories per gram in fact. This compares with protein and carbohydrates at 4 calories per gram, and fat, with a whopping 9 calories per gram. But more than that, it’s usually the extra nibbles, which are consumed with a glass of wine or over a beer, that do the damage. Additionally, as a source of fuel for the body, alcohol is rapidly and preferentially absorbed, leaving the accompanying meal to be stored as fat. So, it makes good sense to lay off the alcohol, at least during the week.

Exercise is crucial, but not sufficient by itself, to effect significant weight loss.
There are 3 forms of exercise: aerobic, stretch and resistance. However, going to a gym is not essential, and perhaps you would prefer to exercise outside. I say, go for it! Indeed, it’s better to do everyday activities and exercise your muscles in a composite way, rather than individually separate each muscle group for repetitions. This introduces the concept of wholeness. But just to put exercise into perspective, remember that if you eat just one fast food (no names mentioned!) takeaway chicken drumstick, you’ll have to run 5 kms to work off the calorie input that indulgence provides you!

The last strategy employed by Chris is perhaps the most controversial. There’s a lot said about the evils of white foods these days, particularly salt, sugar and white flour. While I don’t intend to explore the merits of each of these foods at this time, as a general rule, eating foods in a form that increases the fibre content will slow down the insulin stimulating effect. Insulin, secreted by the pancreas, assists glucose to move into cells but, among it’s many other effects, causes the body to store fat. But curiously, some 1.73 billion people in Asia consume white rice on a daily basis, but the vast majority of them are not overweight until they start to consume burgers, fries and thickshakes. Pasta, interestingly, enjoys a low glycemic index (the measure of how quickly blood glucose rises after eating a particular type of food) as a result of the way it’s made. The damage occurs when it’s garnished with Parmesan or any grated cheese!

Perhaps what helped Chris was the discipline he mustered for those 12 weeks. He set himself a target and he took action. And it was not too arduous, as he factored in some weekend relief, without restrictions. In this way, he was able to sustain his effort and not chuck it in when the going got tough. Additionally, he did it as part of a workplace health challenge, so there was group support as well.

Reflecting on these strategies, can you see yourself shooting for a similar health target? Imagine how proud of yourself you’ll feel when you attain your goal! And consider what else you’ll be able to tackle afterwards…. You’ll feel unstoppable!

In part two, I’ll explore some principles that will guide you as you set about planning your own health revolution.